29. Waiting...

 Or the blog post in which Matt wonders what happened to the College Humour genre.

Another day, another film and a film whose neck might very well be on the chopping block as today we use this film as a litmus test whether films of this genre actually stand the test of time.

There was a time when these type of films dominated the cinemas and home rental market. Where you couldn't walk past seeing some kind of film in which horny college students got up to no good and or attempted to lose their virginity. I think ultimately what killed them off was those 'Movie' Movies, you know, 'Disaster', 'Epic' and the like that oversaturated the market and containing jokes so thin they could've been used as tracing paper.

That being said they did make stars out of a few, most notably Chris Evans when he popped up in 'Not Another Teen Movie' and one might argue one of today's stars as if it wasn't for the success of 'Van Wilder' the world may not have been treated to the Canadian delight that is Ryan Reynolds.

It's back to the mid noughties today as we slide in:

WAITING... (2005 dir. Rob McKittrick)

I've no idea what those strategically placed olives are supposed to represent...*

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

Long before the decade plus time I gave CEX or indeed Cineworld, Waterstones etc, I worked in hospitality, primarily a mixture of fast food and restaurants. When I first stumbled upon 'Waiting...' I'm pretty sure it was a bootleg copy that I got off my manager during my first CEX stint. I think 'The Mist' was on that DVD too actually so that speaks volumes of the diversity of what was on it.

Anyhow I was a fresh faced twenty something year old, just into university so this type of humour was my cup of tea. It also helped that it contained quite a few familiar faces in it too. Despite Ryan Reynolds being slathered all over the box and having already been won over by his charms via 'Van Wilder' and 'Two Guys, A Girl...', there was also Justin Long fresh of his 'Dodgeball' run, the very funny Anna Faris who had been stuck in 'Scary Movie' hell at this point but was easily the best thing in them, David 'Whammy' Koechner from 'Anchorman' and wait...could it be? IT IS!

It's everyone's favourite Latin American character actor! It also occurs to me that I've spelt his first name wrong as it's 'Luis' so I'll need to correct that for next time.

Needless to say there was enough gags and relatable material that struck a chord with me back when I watched it. But much like my days work in hospitality, this film is a long forgotten memory. Now that I'm nearing forty closer than twenty, will these gags still hold up or is this really a product of its time.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

It's that Ryan Reynolds' factor isn't it? Can one man's charm and delivery keep what I remember being a pretty respectable film at the time afloat? Can the supporting cast do their thing and make me laugh or will everything seem so horribly dated now and I'll wince at the dialogue and gags. Well there's only one way to find out...

The review:

It almost made it. Don't get me wrong, it's dated horribly, from Ryan's frosted tips, to the liberal homophobic slurs used throughout to whatever the fuck the characters of T-Dog and Nick are supposed to be, there's a lot of bad in this but it was almost inoffensive enough to coast through and for me to reassess it in perhaps a decade's time.

But see I'm a guy who will watch a film until the last credit has rolled and...well we'll get back to that.

'Waiting...' is a film that really wants to be 'Clerks' in a lot of ways. Detailing the life of a day in a restaurant from its early lunch opening up until the dinner rush and close. There are just so many stereotypes along the way, Ryan's Monty being the calm know it all leader, Long's Dean being the indecisive 'I don't know if I want to do this for the rest of my life' at a crossroads character. The women have little to no characterization apart from looking pretty.

So feasibly what was convincing me that I should hold on to this?

Ryan was stunned after Justin told him that voicing Chipmunks would be the next big leap in his career...

There is an air of fun to it, Luis Guzman seems to be having the time of his life out there. I had to draw amusing parallels to myself and overworked, been here too long 'Naomi' and Chi McBride is fun as philosophising kitchen porter Bishop.

Yes I was even looking to look past the somewhat disturbing subplot of having sex with underaged girls and just let this one cruise on by, sort of like background noise. There was just enough charm, it still stirred up memories of my working past and hell I even laughed once out loud during a scene with a child's birthday.

But then I hit the end credits and we're 'treated' to T-Dog and Nick doing a rap. Now Nick is played by Andy Milonakis, a name that will have no bearing on anyone but it's important to note that he was a celebrity as he had his own show on MTV at the time. Now admittedly, anyone could have had their own MTV show as long as you knew how to swear, fart and shout at the top of your lungs, it was THAT easy during this time.

Anyway this is right at the very end so as I weighed up my score and was like, ok back on the shelf you go, this absolutely terrible rap detailing the worst rap has to over such as 'cutting ho's', the size of a penis and all those horrible tropes that killed rap in the first place were dished up like microwaved leftovers and I was done with 'Waiting...'

Should it stay or should it go?

Flung to the trade pile as soon as the rube-goldberg easter egg at the very end was finished. Like I said it almost scraped through by the skin of its teeth but let's be honest, if I want 'Diet Clerks' I'll just watch 'Mallrats' instead. I give it a 6 out of 10, losing a whole point for any scene with T-Dog and Nick.

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.

*Oh! They're supposed to be breasts, I get it now, how amusing!

 

28. A Walk Among The Tombstones

 So after our fast and frenetic excursion into actionville, we hit something a lot more calmer but engrossing nonetheless. 

This was I felt Liam Neeson's big comeback after making a ton of action dreck since 'Taken'. Sure we all loved Taken, doing the ol' 'Special Skills, I will find you' quote but what had often been forgotten is that the sequels were abysmal, 'Taken 2' still ranking as one of the worst movies I have seen in my life. Other forgettable fares such as 'Non-Stop' & 'Unknown' provided mild entertainment but was just as quickly forgotten as it was watched.

No, for Liam to get back in the saddle was this moody solemn Neo Noir thriller that I vividly remembered from my Cineworld days and have held in high regard ever since. Today we turn the clock back to 2014 and watch:

A WALK AMONG THE TOMBSTONES (2014 dir. Scott Frank)

It's kinda hard to make a joke about Generic DVD Cover 968, Man holds gun on cover for the umpteenth time.

Why I watched it/Why I liked it:

As I recall 'Tombstones' didn't actually hit UK shores until late 2014/early 2015. I still had carte blanche to watch any movie I wanted as an employee of Cineworld at the time and have vague recollections of watching this in early 2015 in my remaining days of working there with the odd trio of 'Paddington' and 'Foxcatcher'.

As an employee of Cineworld, you would often be subjected to the various trailers before films and there was something about 'Tombstones' that caught my eye. Its moody atmosphere, the fact that Liam Neeson was playing a gritty Private Eye, this was well within my wheelhouse and decided I would give it a go provided the reviews were decent.

As reviews started trickling in, this indeed got good reviews so making my mind up, I went to see it and was rather glad I did. Neeson seemed to sink his teeth into this role and showed enthusiasm for it, something he hadn't done in some time. I loved the classic trope of a P.I. getting in over his head but struggling on as it was the right thing to do and there's just this tinge of dark humour that strings throughout.

I resolved that when it was a good price in CEX, I'd pick it up on the cheap and did so as sadly despite the good reviews it got, enthusiasm for the film dropped just as quickly as its asking price. That didn't detract it from being a little gem in my eyes though.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

I'm pretty confident that it will. 'A Walk Among The Tombstones' isn't the type of leave your brain at the door fare that you can just stick on at any given moment. It's dark, grim and moody for most of the time but it's rewarding and that's why I think it'll stay.

The review:

I came into 'Tombstones' knowing what to expect and honestly I still wasn't disappointed. Neeson slowly and deliberately growls his lines but each one of them carries a punch to them. The New York setting is bleak, heavy rain falls continuously and private eye Matt Scudder is just trying to do the right thing, even if his 'clients' aren't exactly the right people.

The atmosphere just sucks you in, almost every shot is gritty and realistic, imagining that you're there with every tread of the foot. I love how Scudder is essentially agreeing to help grieved drug dealers because there's a greater evil kidnapping their loved ones and because deep down, it's the right thing to do.

                            

Dot Cotton's replacements at Albert Square were a tad intimidating...

I remember vividly this was one of my first introductions to David Harbour as he looked to be permanently cast as 'movie bad guy'. Now he tends to play nice guys which is a nice change of pace for him but there's no denying he plays a really nasty piece of work here, alongside Adam David Thompson. These are men beyond redemption and unlike other pieces where at times, you enjoy the hamminess or performance of the actor portraying the bad guy, these guys do their job so well that you want them to get their comeuppance.

 So praise indeed to Liam Neeson and our bad guys and indeed a solid performance by X Factor USA contestant of all things Brian 'Astro' Bradley. His performance of TJ skirts the rim of playing annoying teen sidekick to Neeson's Scudder but they reign it in and  he delivers a respectable performance too. If anything it's his parts that slightly but not noticeably let the film down if at all.

 'A Walk Among The Tombstones' is a drenched, cold and grim detective piece but if you find enjoyment in such things, as I do, you'll be left satisfied.

Should it stay or should it go?

I believe this is my third viewing of said film after watching it in the cinema and watching it with my dad. I can honestly say I was as gripped upon this viewing as I had the previous viewings. There's something sobering about the piece, like a shot of espresso that just perks up the senses. This certainly won't be to eveybody's tastes but it works just fine for me.  I'll give it an 8 out of 10 rating here.

Well, next time we'll see if Ryan Reynold's delightful charm can keep an old movie on the shelf and we'll see a familiar face along the way.

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.

27. Wanted

 Or as this blog post could be also known as, Matt rants about Mark Millar for a little bit.

Hoo boy! Mark Millar huh? There's a guy who peaked about 10-15 years ago, right? I mean to be fair to the guy, when you've been in the business writing comics for so long, your best ideas are going to be used up eventually leaving you with whatever dregs he's writing for 'Millarworld' these days. And there's that whole 'Millarworld' ego trip thing too, an acquisition I'm sure Netflix are looking at now, wondering why they coughed up the dough, yielding little results.

Still, to be fair to the guy, he has written his fair amount of noticeable stories. The Avengers in film series wouldn't have existed if The Ultimates hadn't come to life and I still have a soft spot for the first Kick-Ass  and Kingsman films.

Truth is that's why I could see why Netflix made the deal, the man was on a hot streak, it looked as if he could do little wrong. Another success story at the time, was today's film and we'll be revisiting the world of:

WANTED (2008 dir. Timur Bekmambetov)

 McAvoy's shoulder had seized up so whatever 'cool pose' you thought he was doing, he's actually in tremendous pain...

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

I think one theme that we've been hitting on constantly that's become pretty obvious is the following:

Matt likes big bombastic action films.

Wanted certainly filled that quota at the time. In fact, there was a little swell of Wanted mania about the place as I remember vaguely playing the video game adaptation for this on the Xbox 360 to boot. But it ticked a whole mess of boxes:

Extravagant bullet battle sequences with the often remembered 'bendy bullets'? Check.

Smoking hot Angelina Jolie purring her way through every scene she was in? Check.

Typically dependable Morgan Freeman performance. Check.

So inevitably it pleased a young mid twenties Matt in the way that many an explosive action film had and featured enough unique gimmicks at the time that sort of put it ahead of the pack and was an easy pick up in CEX when said film had dropped in price.

But as we know, nostalgia puts a funny sheen on things and I legitimatley haven't revisited this film in years. Hell, when I composed a top action film list of the noughties, this didn't even cross my mind again, so was this simply a case where its cute little gimmicks outweigh what could be construed as a mediocre noughties outing now? That's what we're here to find out...

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

Honest to God, I have no idea. The fact that I thought another film was AFTER Warrior and then was slightly disappointed that I had this movie first sort of summed up my feelings on watching Wanted today. 

It sort of has that 'Noughties' feeling about it, like chugging a can of Red Bull. You drink it and you're like 'Whoo, I'm all pumped up, that was AWESOME!' but then you grow up, you drink coffee now and you look back on your energy drink quaffing days and think 'Man, I was an idiot'. That's sort of the vibes I'm getting from today's revisit...

The review:

In hindsight I actually appreciate going back to revisit these movies in my collection as it gives me fresh eyes in which to view them with.

With that I can comfortably say that there is an arrogant stench of wankiness that permeates all throughout Wanted that just keeps burrowing under the skin and that ultimately becomes unlikeable. Like the equivalent of the talented sportsperson in your secondary/high school who you thought was cool back when you were a kid but ultimately realise they were a tosser. That's what this film is.

There are some pretty cool action sequences in this, particularly towards the end of the second into the third act. There's something strangely satisfying about watching James McAvoy's Wesley shoot Mark Warren in the eye, ram his gun butt through the socket and kill people while firing through Warren's head.

But that's sort of where the fun ends, other than the novelty of spotting the delightful Chris Pratt in an early role couple with the usage of Rupert Holmes' 'The Pina Colada Song' that just made me wish I was watching Guardians Of The Galaxy instead.

These three had knackered Rocky's training session...

 So the bad then. Look, I like James McAvoy, I've enjoyed a ton of things he's been in, but you can tell this is his first American film and his accent is pretty jarring all the way throughout. There's this feeling that he's been asked to summon the ability of Michael J Fox throughout this film too. But where Michael J Fox can just effortlessly turn on his boyish charm and suck you in, the same can't be said for McAvoy's Wesley here.

Seriously, by the time he's screamed 'Eeeyaarrrr!' or 'Arrrrghhh' by the eighth time, you're kind of hoping he'll get a bullet in his head or his jaw wired shut, there's just this air of annoyance. Ramped up by his pissy little narrative which seemed like fun back in the heady days of 2008 but now just grates. Then by the third act where he's essentially insulting the audience, my mind had been made up, I flipped the screen the middle finger.

Then there's the soundtrack, Danny Elfman's annoying guitar stings, the ability to make Nine Inch Nails seem tame and whiny. Couple this with Bekmambetov's directorial approach. Pretentious slow down shots and then sped up, Slowed down speech. It's the sort of shite that would give Olivier Megaton wet dreams.

Sad reality is this would probably mark the last good role Angelina Jolie would be in and just serves as a reminder that Morgan Freeman is a consummate professional in whatever he appears in.

Should it stay or should it go?

As soon as Wesley utter's the line 'What the fuck have you done with your life', I'd agreed that the movie needed to be slung onto the now dusty trade pile. There's just parts in it that had me itching to check how much run time I had left. It wasn't a completely unenjoyable experience but like I said, that swagger this movie has just got on my tits. A time wasting 6 out of 10 experience then but I could easily waste another 10-15 years, even 20, before revisiting this again.

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.

 

 

26. Warrior

 Oh hey! It's been a while huh?

As I type this, we're nearing the end of Britain's second lockdown due to COVID-19 but I thought it'd be a wasted opportunity if I had nigh on a month off work and didn't chip away at a few more movies in the collection, especially as I'm in this good place of not having any lingering uncompleted series over my head, having finished 'Oz' at the beginning of the month.  A few completed comic series and video games later and I've got the itch to get back in the saddle.

Today's film, sort of became the roadblock after a pretty productive summer of writing. There's nothing wrong with it, I just know that it's a tad more serious then previous watches and I wasn't feeling it at the time. Regardless it's now time to wipe the dust off of the DVD case, clear the clothing from the ol' viewing chair and watch:

WARRIOR (2011 dir. Gavin O' Connor)

'All The Rockys rolled into one' claimed Shortlist. Thankfully this isn't the case as it would have a painfully boring part in lieu of Rocky V but also it sadly doesn't have fucking awesome music montage sequences a la Rocky IV...

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

Come on, with a tag line with 'All the Rocky's...' how could I not give it a spin? I think I remember renting this one with Dad at his local video shop in Sholing. Blockbuster's had long since passed by this point so the locals were the only way to rent. Sadly my lazy arse father couldn't be arsed to take the short drive down and he was too lazy to return the rentals on time and unlike Blockie's who would let him off with it, he didn't seem to understand that this wasn't how things were done post Blockies.

Still, we managed to pop off a few rentals in that time, one of them being 'Warrior'.  Being a wrestling fan as well, I remembered there was a bit of buzz about Kurt Angle's appearance in it too (albeit, he's completely silent in it). The whole MMA/UFC craze was buzzing at this point due to a variety of colourful stars passing through it and I mean look at that box art. That's a lot of stars right there. It needed to be checked out.

What followed was a highly enjoyable two hours of pumping MMA action interwoven with interesting family drama. I remember this being another noticeable hit for rising star Tom Hardy, it was my first memorable look at dependable all rounder Joel Edgerton and I particularly remember Nick Nolte playing 'Alcoholic Dad', rather well to boot.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

I think chances are good. I don't think the movie will have aged THAT much and the performances were really stand out. It'll be that sort of classy high brow sports movie that 'The Wrestler' fell into also. Something I may want to stick on again after a Rocky kick or something like that.

The review:

Warrior is not a movie that'll change your life but it tells a story, it tells it well and you don't feel like over two hours have passed, that's the sign of a strong movie in my eyes.

My recollection was slightly wrong, Nick Nolte played 'Recovering Alcoholic Dad', his (unexplained) reprehensible actions as a raging alcoholic having split his family in three, his two sons going off in separate directions. 

We're greeted with moody, detached, pill popping Tom Hardy and his mysterious story of how he came back and the trials and tribulations of well meaning family man Joel Edgerton who doesn't want to lose his house thanks to the banks fucking him over.

Inevitably the golden ticket, the one hope for both men is a $5 million dollar MMA tournament where for each man, it's a shot of redemption.

The first half of the film sets out the story and you feel an emotional connection with everyman Edgerton. The amusing fact that a Brit and an Aussie are playing brothers from Pittsburgh aside, you become involved in their stories and the movie sucks you in.

Tom had taken exception to a fan claiming 'This Means War' was their favourite film of his...

 The highest praise I can put on this movie is that even though I knew the ending, I still got sucked in the fights and felt a swell of joy whenever Joel progressed, wanting him to win and make things right for his family.

There's not too much to gripe about honestly, it's a film about performances. The choice of song for the dramatic ending is a bit weak, considering what a good job the score had done throughout the film, it weighed it down slightly.

It could have been shaved down slightly too, at times the film likes to hammer home the desperate situation of our characters and therefore lays it on a bit thick but ultimately it does make the final outcome that much more pleasing.

Should it stay or should it go?

Absolutely. It's good 'meat and potatoes' sports style drama. Warrior gets a respectable 7.5 I think upon this watching but it's score could easily shoot up again depending on my mood on subsequent watches.

Well that's the serious stuff out of the way, we're heading into some pretty goofy action fare in the next film so stick around for that with a film I don't think time has been too kind too honestly...

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major

 

25. Warrior King

Ahhh Tony Jaa, who remembers him eh?...

...What do you mean who's Tony Jaa?

Well at one point Tony Jaa had the martial arts film world at his feet. Exploding onto the scene with "Ong Bak", his dynamic mainstream debut, Tony displayed his Muay Thai skills masterfully, leaving any viewer back in 2003 open-mouthed in disbelief. We'll actually be covering "Ong Bak" eventually within the blog but needless to say, the stunts and action on display had people raving.

Hailed as the new king of the martial arts genre, Jaa was a breath of fresh air in the stale scene. Jackie Chan and Jet Li were now getting older, at least well into their 40's at this point and couldn't explode onto the screen as they had. Both had been poached by Hollywood and although earlier forays displayed them still at their best, by 2003 Jackie was content making comedies and Jet Li's reliance on wire work was beginning to get old very fast.

Jaa was poised to take the crown and struck while the iron was hot, quickly making follow up "Warrior King". Or at least that's what it's known as in the UK. Its original title was "Tom-Yum-Goong" which translates into 'Hot and sour prawn soup'. As hilarious as it would be for a film to be called that, I don't think it would have got the attention of the action junkies. In the US it's better known as "The Protector".

But sadly it all went a bit too much too fast for Tony. Opting to direct the next two "Ong Bak" sequels (although in reality, they're prequels) himself, he instead presented two overblown attempts at historical epics. Some good action aside, the movies were complete slogs to power through and the sheen had gone, the UK distributor quickly going cold on Tony and he slid down the card. By the time he mounted a comeback, the chaps from "The Raid" were the new talking point in the martial arts world and Tony was yesterday's news.

But let's catch him at his peak today with:

WARRIOR KING (2005 dir. Prachya Pinkaew)

 Ahh, the lad's mags comments. I think 'Genius' might be a bit strong there Maxim, it's a film about a bloke beating up lots of other blokes, it's hardly Martin Scorsese...

Why I bought/Why I liked it:

I, much like anyone who had the benefit of watching "Ong Bak" quickly became a fan of Tony Jaa. With the action sequences still fresh in mind and repeated viewings under our belts, my father and I were eagerly awaiting the next film of Mr Jaa's.

Finally available in Blockbusters (lighters please!), we watched and were blown away once again, even citing the action sequences to be superior to that of "Ong Bak"'s. Now reviewing it again remains to be seen which was the better film but needless to say, it made a strong first impression.

If you've seen "Ong Bak", you've seen the plot of "Warrior King". Just replace 'man needs to get back idol of worship from bad guys' to 'man needs to get back elephants from bad guys'. The plot is weak but as any GOOD martial arts film is, it SHOULD be. We just need a guy kicking some ass for the majority of the film and Tony Jaa does, Game Of Death style.

Yup, just like a video game, Tony needs to make his way through various henchmen and boss battles before confronting the top boss and getting back his darned elephants. That's it and it's glorious to watch unfurl.

Of course, myself being one of these action junkies, it got picked up pretty quickly after that initial home release.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

Are you kidding? Good old 'leave your brain at the door and watch the violence unfold' films are the whole reason I love films in the first place. It's perfect escapism and I think its place in the collection is comfortable.

The review:

As expected, the action is phenomenal. When rolling it REALLY gets underway which I think feasibly is about 18 minutes in. Before that you sort of get some exposition, a little taste of Thai culture and some shots of some lovely elephants including a delightful baby one which had me melting in my chair.

So to further the plot, the elephants get stolen which leads Tony's Kham to Sydney. Here we discover that they're potentially food for an exotic restaurant which also acts as a criminal front for drugs and illegal prostitution. All exotic tastes are catered here: scorpions, turtles, porcupines, bats...

Kham eventually fights his way through more bad guys you could count. There's an awesome sequence with EXTREME sports fighters, invoking memories of the old EXTREME sports phase of the early noughties. Tony Hawk! Mat Hoffman! Dave Mirra! Phil 'The Power' Taylor! Peter Ebdon!

He then faces Eddy Gordo en route to the big showdown with former WWE 'Wrestler' Nathan Jones. What needs to be mentioned here besides my gushing of the action sequences is that Pinkaew really knows how to frame said action sequences too. The foley artists are on point with every strike and snap booming out of the speakers and the camera guys are great at following the action so that we can see what's going on. No mean feat as one sequence has Tony Jaa going so fast, numerous cameraman had to jump in to keep up.

Tony squares up to Nathan Jones. Nothing to do with The Supremes hit, Nathan was so bad as a wrestler he got pulled from his scheduled Wrestlemania match on THE DAY leaving Undertaker to wrestle a handicap match...

So that's the good out of the way, how about the bad? Well, "Warrior King" honestly boasts some of the worst caucasian actors I may have ever seen this side of Ashton Kutcher and Taylor Kitsch. Seriously, this is their native language and yet the delivery is so wooden it may as well be pornography for beavers. It makes the cast of 'Baywatch' seem like a touring Shakespearean group.

Presumably, they just pulled people off the street as there's no way Australian extras or actors could be this bad. Not from a country that gave us Geoffrey Rush, Guy Pearce, Margot Robbie and Stefan Dennis.

Some of the shots are annoying as all hell too, there's this annoying effect where the outer edges of the shot are blurred which occurs way too much. The action does indeed slow when Tony isn't kicking people either including a dodgy CGI scene that really takes the viewer out of the film. There's also a bit where Tony needs to act but then apparently forgets he's having the crap getting kicked out of him so he no-sells everything like he's Road Warrior Hawk or something.

And then there's the main bad person. Oooh, I'd forgotten about this. So the subplot is an evil trans-woman who wants to take over the criminal empire from her father so has him killed and any other potential candidates to take over, killed also. It's obvious she's the most suitable person for the job but because she's trans this eliminates her from the position and therefore lots of transphobic slurs come out of the woodwork. Ah, good old 2005.

These negatives aside, "Warrior King" should be watched for one reason and that's the action sequences, they're so good it makes up for all the above mentioned bad.

Should it stay or should it go?

It's easy to digest martial arts fare. You get that, a high-speed longboat chase and a Double Dragon type sequence in a restaurant. It stays in. Perhaps those rose-tinted glasses became clearer when re-watching and those highlighted all the negative points I mentioned but it's still a fun enough film to garner a re-watch a few more years down the line. That being said, the bad points did knock the rating down a bit so I'm giving it a 7.5 out of 10 instead of my estimated 8.

It does give me an opportunity to post this for the last time though:

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.

24. The Warriors

Can you dig it? No, I'm not trying to strike up a conversation with a graveyard worker or even trying my hand at a Booker T impression. No, it's the four words that usually get spoken when bringing up today's film, "The Warriors". This usually comes with a side helping of an impression of Cyrus from the film delivered in his deep tone which no one usually is able to pull off.

So it's the film that spawned so many imitators despite its simple plot, cemented Walter Hill's status as an exciting director and for better or worse gave us James Remar. It also gives people an easy costume idea for when Halloween is around the corner. So let's re-watch:

THE WARRIORS (1979. dir Walter Hill)

Geez, more like The Borrowers based on this sucky DVD cover. Sadly the infamous poster with all the gang members wasn't used until later releases...

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

"The Warriors" was actually recommended to me by my Dad when it was getting a TV showing maybe about 15 years ago. To be honest, despite garnering a cult following that would eventually spawn a video game spinoff from Rockstar, it was a film that tended not to get a lot of air time on the networks. Possibly because they didn't want impressionable youngsters to form their own gangs and run rampant in say Norwich for example.

So I watched it and thoroughly enjoyed it. I liked the dark feel of the film. I enjoyed the survival element and the simple plot of the Warriors simply trying to make it from one area to another and staying alive. I liked that the little bitch Thomas Waites got shoved onto a railway track and smooshed by a subway train. The colourful cast of characters and gangs also helped it stand out too. So when the opportunity to purchase it in, you guessed it, CEX, came about, it was purchased and sat in the collection ready for a moment such as today to be re-watched and re-evaluated.

Oh, the soundtrack's really good too. Damn, I don't remember too much about this film, do I?

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

Unless time has been rather unkind or my memory's as bad as recapping the previous section, I think all will be well for "The Warriors". There's a possibility I may upgrade it to one of the many director's cut editions that are floating about in the ether but I think it's still a classic of its time and way ahead of the pack for films made in 1979.

The review:

So a few things:

At the beginning of the film, we see that Cyrus has called a big meet of the gangs, only 9 members from each gang permitted, no weapons. As exposition unwinds and we also get our introduction to 'The Warriors', we also get glimpses of other gangs. There are some pretty snazzily dressed chaps in purple, then there's a gang of mimes...

MIMES!

Who the fuck thinks:

 'Hey, we need a motif for our gang.'
'I know what'll stop people from messing with us, we should dress up as mimes...'

I wanted to kick these guys asses and I'm not even a violent person. Hell, I could probably beat them too, what're they gonna do, hit me with invisible weapons?

Also when Cyrus inevitably gets shot to get the plot moving (Ohh Spoilers: The movie came out in 1979 for crying out loud) and good old rat-faced Luther yells out:

'It wuz The Warriors! They did it!'
at no point does anyone go:
'Can anyone confirm that? Your gang member in The Rogues backs this up but I don't feel he's a reliable witness somehow...'

Fun quibbling aside, for the most part, it is a breakneck 89 minutes in which the titular Warriors have to stay alive through any means necessary. This isn't easy because the majority of them are REALLY STUPID but it's also manageable because, despite a number of threatening-looking gangs, they can't actually fight for shit.

Here's a Baseball Fury, possibly doing an early audition for Domino in "Deadpool". Memorable for their look and not much else, apparently no one taught them how to use those bats as they get their asses handed to them by The Warriors...

As stated before I do enjoy the feel of the film, almost set entirely at nighttime. You can tell it's a hot muggy night in New York as the streets steam under the glow of electric lights. Walter Hill's casting is impressive too. Michael Beck takes lead as Swan, James Remar grunts and uses 'faggot' an awful lot as lunkheaded Ajax but the rest of the Warriors play their roles well. Special mention goes to Luther played by David Patrick Kelly who usually gets the best lines and is wonderfully annoying making you hope he gets his comeuppance.

There are a few minutes that linger just a touch, the growing relationship between Swan and Mercy, a girl who follows them from Orphan territory drags a bit but for the most part, there's always another fight around the corner.

Should it stay or should it go?

It's a perfectly inoffensive way to burn through 90 minutes and can easily be slapped on in the background while doing other things or if you just need a go-to movie. I'm giving this one a 7.5 out of 10, there's lots of cool stuff and ideas that happen throughout but it doesn't hit that upper echelon of an action movie.

Next stop, back to Martial Arts town.

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.








 

23. The Way Of The Dragon

Oh, fuck yeah! It's time for some good old fashioned martial arts action with the man who changed the landscape for them, I told you we were hitting quite the action patch.

My love of martial arts actually started back in the waning days of our very local video rental shop, 'Swaythling Video Library'. I'd started really enjoying the clips that they'd show on tv so my dad took the leap and despite me not being quite of age to see them, my dad plonked "Wheels On Meals" in front of me and thus changed my life.

Yup, my first taste of the world of Martial Arts films was through a traditional Jackie Chan action-comedy. Of course, I knew who Bruce Lee was at that point but his movies were still in BBFC hell due to his liberal use of nunchaku throughout. Over here in the UK, any reference for them was banned so we wouldn't get full cuts of a lot of Bruce's films.

It's the early 90s to boot and a high profile biopic was being made of the man at the same time. That being said it wasn't until well into the late 90s that I believe Channel 4 finally did a retrospective of his films.

It's sadly a lost thing now. Back then the 'arty' channels like BBC2 and Channel 4 would present a season of films highlighting a particular actor or director. It was through this I got to see a bunch of Marx Brothers movies, Leone's Dollars trilogy and ultimately Bruce Lee's back catalogue. Which brings us up to:

THE WAY OF THE DRAGON (1972 dir. Bruce Lee)

It's between this or the final scene of "Enter The Dragon" with a bloodied Bruce in the hall of mirrors that would grace many a poster back in the day...

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

Of the five 'main' Bruce Lee films, I own four of them. That's mainly because I argue that "Game Of Death" is at best a quarter of a Bruce Lee film. His action scenes are excellent but where it's infamously the film he never completed, the exploitative story and overall lack of Bruce make it an unenjoyable watch. No point in owning a film for 15-20 minutes of action sequences...

For years I was adamant that THIS was the best Bruce Lee film. In my later years, I'd say it was tied with "Enter The Dragon", solely on the basis that "Enter" flies by at a crazy pace and the spy element and the banter between Jim Kelly and John Saxon coupled with crazy handless villain makes it an insane watch.

The running theme in those other films though was Bruce often played a stoic man. He was mostly all action rarely letting his personality shine through. "The Way Of The Dragon" changed all that, unsurprisingly as it's the only film Bruce managed to write, direct and star in before his untimely demise.

Those who knew Bruce behind the scenes knew that he had a fun sense of humour and that's evident throughout this film. He's more relaxed, he gets to have fun and it makes for a far more enjoyable film than say "The Big Boss" does.

Of course, there are lashings of action sequences including the infamous fight scene where Bruce and Chuck freaking Norris fight in the Rome Colleseum but just as fondly remembered is his impish sense of humour which shines throughout.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

To date, I think it's still the only Bruce Lee film I shelled out full price for when I was building the collection. As such it's one of the oldest films in my collection and I see no reason as to why it should leave any time soon.

The review:

The great thing about this film is that Bruce subverts your typical image of him. The first part of the film he brilliantly plays the 'fish out of water' while in Rome speaking none of the language and unaccustomed to their culture. Simple things such as finding the toilet or ordering some food result in comedic circumstances.

They even tease action early on but hilariously deprive you of it when customers in the restaurant arrive. It's essentially Bruce sending up the image of himself and having fun with it, challenging the viewers who think they know what he's all about.

The plot is one of those gloriously simple ones, often associated with the martial arts genre. A Chinese restaurant in Rome is under threat from gangsters, Bruce Lee's Ah Lung or Tang Lung (depending on what day the subtitlers were working) has been sent from Hong Kong to help out. He's the Cantonese Equalizer!

Hilariously because of the time period, the gangsters resemble the rock group Boston upon entering the restaurant and thus by today's standards would probably pose little threat but it's still fun to watch Bruce kick all of their butts.

I've watched this in the original Cantonese with English Subtitles as I often do with Bruce films. Odd really as I often watch Jackie films with Dubbing. I have done this so I can experience the pure annoyance of effeminate henchman Ho's mocking in the Colleseum as I like to punish myself. I can assure you it is quite annoying but purposefully so.

Bruce was so hard that he kick the beard off Chuck Norris' face thus rendering the memes obsolete...

Finally, the big bad boss realizes that the combined efforts of Boston and The Doobie Brothers weren't going to cut it and brings in the big guns in the form of then beardless sasquatch Chuck Norris. Yes, for better or worse this was the film that jump-started Chuck Norris' film career. I say for worse as despite cheesy performances in 'Walker, Texas Ranger', his back catalogue is pretty fucking awful and not in the so bad its good way. TRY watching "Missing In Action", I dare you.

Despite these minor niggles, "The Way Of The Dragon" is still a fantastic piece of kung-fu cinema, even if Bruce is still hammering home the Chinese Kung-Fu is better than Japanese Karate them he'd used in "Fist Of Fury". It's a really fun film and it's a shame Bruce never had the opportunity to make more under his own direction.

Should it stay or should it go?

Just as easy to watch as the first time I managed to back on a Saturday night on Channel 4. The backdrop and extras are hilariously dated but the film still remains a tasty slice of entertainment and a must-see for any fans of the martial arts genre.  A chunky 9 out of 10 rating here.

Action time rolls on with the next film. So until next time, I remain,

Matt Major








 

22. The Way Of The Gun

Action movie time! We're actually hitting a patch of them for this period, some I haven't revisited for a while, some I can actually barely remember. Today's entry falls in the latter.

Christopher McQuarrie's a big name in the action movie genre. First cutting his teeth in the highly acclaimed twisty-turney crime caper "The Usual Suspects", McQuarrie first brushed shoulders with eventual collaborator Tom Cruise by writing "Valkyrie" before solidifying himself with his live-action adaptation of personal favourite author Lee Child's creation Jack Reacher in ummm "Jack Reacher".

Regrettably not returning to direct the sequel, McQuarrie instead went over to Tom's OTHER big movie franchise "Mission Impossible" where he completely reinvigorated the series producing two of the best instalments in the franchise in "Rogue Nation" and "Fallout". But what of his earlier forgotten work?

Nestled between his work on "The Usual Suspects" and "Valkyrie", lies McQuarrie's first directorial feature. Much has been written by McQuarrie himself stating it as a missed opportunity to other critics declaring it to be a lost gem of the action movie genre. Having rapidly become a fan of Christophers' after his kick-ass adaptation of "Jack Reacher", I opted to hunt it down, knowing it often popped its head up in CEX at the time.

THE WAY OF THE GUN (2000 dir. Christopher McQuarrie)

A still for the box art of the UK release was nigh on impossible, the only image I could find was a blurry one on Amazon. Just imagine the same cover but completely in red and you have the UK box art.

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

Always looking to broaden my horizons, I needed to unearth some action movie gems that were at least available in the country (regrettably so many delightful action films in the states have never made their way on home entertainment release on ol' Blighty). Looking through lists, one film appeared to keep popping up on critics lists. Further research revealed that a solid cast plus the rapidly impressive McQuarrie involvement made this one a bit of a no-brainer to pick up.  Through CEX mail order I believe...

Benicio Del Toro is usually a firm favourite but I always felt bad for Ryan Phillippe. He never seemed to shake the stigma of the pretty-boy teen actor from "Cruel Intentions" despite putting in many noticeable good turns later on in his career. Here he was still the draw so despite Benicio being the veteran, Ryan gets top billing.

In truth, I can remember little about the film outside of the opening scene which is excellent and a pretty innovative final shootout scene at the end. Having watched the film with my old man, we both agreed that it was good but missing something throughout.

In fact, it looked like it was going on the chopping block then and there but the final act's shootout had impressed me that much that it was spared and replaced back in the collection. Foreshadowing?

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

Tastes mature and patience can be prolonged. When I was a college student, if you'd sat me down and made me watch "Amadeus", I would probably pay little attention to it, instead thinking about which wrestlers I could create in 'Smackdown: Shut Your Mouth' for the PS2. Fast forward a few years later, I watch "Amadeus" and am blown away. I have the patience to watch it now, my fidgeting at a minimum.

"The Way Of The Gun" may very well fall into this category, knowing I'm not gearing up for explosions until the final act, I can perhaps be more tolerant of the plot and how we get there. Or on the other hand, my suspicions were true and although enjoyable, it just doesn't cut the mustard. Only one way to find out...

The review:

Ok, quick tangent here. The back of the DVD has a 'Watch Out For:' feature on the back trying to promote other movies also distributed by Momentum Pictures. One of these films is "Requiem For A Dream", another independent 18 certificate film directed by Darren Aronofsky. I'm not a fan but it's certainly fitting in the independent adult film frame.

The other film is "The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle".

Who thought that promoting these two films together was a good idea? Why would you even promote a film where Robert De Niro attempts comedy is a good idea especially as it was universally panned? The mind boggles.

Right, tangent over. "The Way Of The Gun" was a much more enjoyable film for me the second time around. It is a film of its time though. There's no way a film like this could be made today.

It harks back warm memories of the wild west of independent film making. These days the major studios gobble up any hint of independent film making, attempting to just promote it as their own. Back in 2000, there was still leeway given, films made on a budget. Veteran movie stars looking to bolster their careers by appearing in an indy classic much like Mr James Caan is doing in this film. Much like Harvey Keitel took a chance on a young Quentin Tarantino.

Things aren't slick and polished, "The Way Of The Gun"'s backdrops are seedy and dusty but therein lies its charm. Our protagonists are not nice people in the slightest. Phillippe and Del Toro are petty thieves, kidnapping Juliette Lewis is hoping of making a big score and just getting out of this life. They'll happily maim, torture and kill just to get ahead in life yet somehow these end up being our 'good' guys. Yup, it's one of those 'No one's a good guy' films, a sub-genre of action films I always get a kick out of.

A wandering Norm Peterson quickly discovered that not all watering holes were as friendly as 'Cheers'...

What unfolds is another layered twisty plot with reveals gradually being distributed throughout. It's good fun. Sometimes admittedly it can be a little too clever for its own good but I remained involved throughout showing that mature taste I mentioned earlier. The first time around, I sort of got lost a little in the plot, this time it made much more sense.

When before I saw a stripped-back budget film, now when I'm older I can appreciate its sparseness, actually pining for a time when films like these were made and simply had to rely on the resources available. As a result, the performances are of high quality for the most part and the action really delivers a punch. Even in his freshman effort, McQuarrie knew how to frame and present a tense action sequence.

Special mention should go to the excellent opening scene with a ranting Sarah Silverman on peak form. I always wonder what happened to her as one moment she was female comedienne du jour and suddenly she's gone. Shame as I'd rather have her around than Amy Schumer these days.

As mentioned there are some aspects of the film that may turn the modern viewer off, the payoff of the opening scene would never be filmed today and likewise, there's a somewhat uncomfortable piece of dialogue in a sperm bank where the homosexual slur word beginning with 'f' is used freely. I wouldn't blink an eyelid back then but modern-day conditioning does make you wince a little somewhat at the overuse of the word today.

Another point of notice is how desensitized to automatic weapons we were before 9/11. Phillippe's character has to remind them that guns are now present in a hostage situation in order to clear out any bystanders, again another example of a movie of its time.

Should it stay or should it go?

Once again I feel it just avoids the trading pile. There's enough here to warrant a repeated viewing, years down the line. I can see where some people might find this slow as I sort of initially did but if you've got the time and you have a love for the bygone age of the 90s to noughties independent scene, I think this movie will reward you. I'm giving it a 7 out of 10 but who knows if a third viewing might bolster its score.

Martial arts time next with one of the all-time great stars of the genre showcasing his many talents.

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.

21. Wayne's World

So with only 28 reviews under the belt, my method of working backwards through my collection has landed us at this. My favourite movie of all time.

I've touched upon it briefly when typing up the "Wayne's World 2" review. I acknowledge that there are thousands of movies I could have easily picked as my favourite movie of all time. But much like "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" this was a huge chunk of my childhood. Could it have something to do with the repeated viewings on BBC1 when the BBC made more of an effort to stick films on its main two channels outside of a holiday? Maybe. Could it have had a part in my emerging love of rock music, being the main reason I got into Queen at an early age and having their entire back catalogue by the age of 12? Absolutely.

There are so many great connotations and warm memories and for me, it's my ultimate comfort film. Without further hesitation, let's get into:

WAYNE'S WORLD (1992 dir Penelope Spheeris)

Warm memories if you have this on DVD or Blu-Ray, fling it to the pits of Hades if you have a video game version of this, however...


Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

To this date, "Wayne's World" alongside most episodes of 'The Simpsons' and "Clerks" remains one of the few films I can recite by heart. Does it have something to do with those repeated viewings? Sure, but I wouldn't have watched it so many times if I didn't love the hell out of this film.

I owned the soundtrack, first on cassette and then on CD, I would constantly bang my head during 'that' Brian May guitar solo on 'Bohemian Rhapsody' and try to get my friends to join in. I would wear black t-shirts and ill-advised baseball caps. This movie had struck a chord and still does. To this day when watching it, I'm whisked away to being a kid in the early '90s, sunny summer afternoons, rock music blasting, Amiga 500 on the go, visiting my friends to play their SNES's. Those were some of the happiest times of my life and this always acts as a trigger to those memories.

Who ultimately doesn't love a good comedy too? This along with a couple of others helped set the groundwork for my humour which is either a good thing or a bad thing depending on some friends you ask. "Wayne's World" still remains funny to this day.

Mike Myers and Dana Carvey nail their characters and it's breaking of the forth wall is always fun and charming. As a film still finding its feet it relies far less on superstar cameos and more on established comedic character actors. Brian Doyle-Murray, Lara Flynn Boyle as Wayne's psycho ex-girlfriend Stacy and my previous gushing of Rob Lowe's Benjamin and Ed O'Neill's fantastic Glenn all deliver amazing performances here.

Penelope Spheeris' direction is awesome, having made two highly acclaimed documentaries on the rock culture surrounding the film, she was a perfect fit for this film, coupled with Myers' and Bonnie and Terry Turners script. The Turners would go on to create hits such as 'Third Rock From The Sun' and 'That 70s Show'. It's a shame Spheeris and Myers were like oil and water during production as the union here creates something truly special.

There's the soundtrack too, besides Queen who could forger Gary Wright's 'Dream Weaver' cues, Jimi Hendrix's 'Foxy Lady', the live performance of 'Feed My Frankenstein' by Alice Cooper and Tia Carrere's rocking version of 'Ballroom Blitz'. This is all solid gold stuff.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

After a gushing intro like that, how could it not? I doubt I'll go for a pro wrestling 'swerve' and declare my hatred of it within 90 minutes, this inevitably will be nestled back into its rightful place alongside its sequel, ready for a rainy day or my birthday once again. Party On!

The review:

Watching this back, I think what sets this apart from its still entertaining sequel is the simplicity of the film. It's essentially a Cameron Crowe movie but being more self-aware.

Wayne's goals are simple, he wants a guitar, he wants more money in his pocket and ultimately he wants the girl. The thing is all three are obtainable goals too, much more so than say running a rocket concert as was the plot of the second film.

Both Wayne and Garth get equal screen time too, both get to talk to the camera, a fact that didn't really occur during the sequel as much. In fact, as stated Garth's subplot felt tacked on where here he shares almost equal billing. Was this due to the original plot of the sequel having to be scrapped and hurried rewrites or was Mike Myers buying into his own stardom at this point? Either way, the surprising turnaround (merely a year) between the release of this film and its sequel must've hurt it too. Maybe an extra year would've smoothed things out.

This is why "Wayne's World" feels like a more complete film. It actually has time to concentrate on the secondary characters at least giving them something to do. Poor Terry feels like he's there for just continuity in the sequel. There's more of a community aspect too, that the people around Wayne like him so much that they're willing to pitch in and help. It's a feel-good moment, of which there are many.

The reason why my neck probably pops so much these days...I should get that checked out...

As mentioned Rob Lowe's Benjamin is terrifically slimy but his plot to steal the girl makes way more sense than Christopher Walken's Bobby suddenly being engaged and getting married to her in Act 3 of "Wayne's World 2". Hell, even Kurt Fuller's Russell has time to have a redemption character arc within the movie's short run time.

Most importantly though, it can still make me laugh after all this time. I have just as much fun knowing which gags are coming and how they're delivered in 2020 as I did back in 1992. If the then dying Freddie Mercury found the 'Bohemian Rhapsody' car scene to be hilarious then mileage can still be gotten out of this ol' gal for many years to come.

Should it stay or should it go?

As if you had any doubt. "Wayne's World" gets the perfect 10 out of 10 score here and thus endeth the overtly biased portion of our blog review...for now. I'll leave Wayne here to tell you what I still think of the film:

Zang indeed.

Next up, a string of action movies as we break away from comedy land for now.

So until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.

20. Wayne's World 2

Nostalgia's a powerful tool. Upon re-reading my last review, it never occurred to me that "Wedding Crashers" might have nostalgic memories for people of a certain age or generation. It's certainly understandable as it's why this review and ultimately the next review have such strong memories for me.

Everything just clicks, the time period in which you first watched the movie, sweeping you back to memorable happier times in your life. All the jokes just seem to hit and while deep down you know the movie you're watching is maybe average at best, you rate it higher because there are just certain connotations the film has with you that make it a sentimental favourite.

Any reader here should know that any review here is my own and just my personal opinion. I never actively try to discourage anyone from watching a film and the ratings I give them are based on my personal experience.

I'm merely stating this as we're about to experience two reviews of complete and utter bias...

Presenting to you, the sequel to my favourite movie of all time, still:

WAYNE'S WORLD 2 (1993 dir. Stephen Surjik)

Dated reference number one: Bunny ears behind someone. 90's kids, we're still ageing ourselves if we're doing these...

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

As explained, it's the sequel to my favourite film of all time so of course, it was going to get bought.

To further elaborate, "Wayne's World 2" and ultimately "Wayne's World" were HUGE parts of my childhood growing up. I'll probably go into further detail in the next review but I would idolize these films, genuinely thinking they were the height of cool and possibly annoying my childhood chums with constant references to these films whenever I could shoehorn them in.

In reality, it falls under a perfectly entertaining sequel. There are times when the film borrows some of the best elements from the first film, therefore, lacking the originality of its predecessor but at this point, it was a case of 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it'. In the case of the "Wayne's World" franchise, Mike Myers and co knew when to stop too before it outwore its welcome. Had there been a "Wayne's World 3", I may have had more to gripe about.

But there are enough gags and laughs to be had through the duration of the film. Wayne and Garth are still incredibly charming, Cassandra is still drop-dead gorgeous. The supporting actors and cameos are just as memorable too ranging from Ralph Brown's show-stealing Del Preston to personal fav Chris Farley's Milton. It conjures up warm images and the soundtrack is rocking too, Aerosmith not quite in on the gag as Alice Cooper was previously but still game.

Oh, and Christopher Walken plays the bad guy, although nowhere near as effective as Rob Lowe's terrifically slimy performance as Benjamin, he delivers a reliable turn.

It's the 90's in a comedic 95-minute package! Of course, I love this film.

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

It's not even going to get a whiff of the trade pile honestly. Yes, it's dated comedy in places but fuck it, it's MY dated comedy and I love it to bits. The only way I can see it going is if I find a terrific deal on Blu-Ray, but the extras need to be sweet too.

The review:

"Wayne's World 2" is a case of a sequel striking while the iron is hot. As I watched it, you could see a lot of the old gags from the first movie creep back in but there are still some stand out sequences that warrant many a good laugh. I still had a blast watching it but like I said I'm biased.

The movie is gloriously self-referential but perhaps relies on too many film parodies of the time, the final act looking to really hammer home that "Graduate" gag. But the main stars are on fine form, Mike Myers beaming away, sly winks to the camera, Dana Carvey's awkward Garth amiably bumbling along with each scene. Any scene with the aforementioned Ralph Brown is a delight as he pretty much steals the show when he turns up.

Admit it, you're looking at this image and you're doing the voice and routine. I won't judge you.

The movie lacks the tightness of the first, possibly due to the loss of Penelope Spheeris who quite famously had a big falling out with Mike Myers during the production of the first film. It loses its edge somewhat but is still no less an entertaining movie. Some of the strengths of the film, in fact, are the little throwaway gags tossed here and there that reward you for paying attention.

It's from the strength of the first film that the stars started swarming in for the second. Christopher Walken despite being a big coup (and the fact you get to see him bust out the moves) sort of sleepwalks his way through the film, not chewing up the scenery as gloriously as he was in "Welcome To The Jungle". As mentioned Rob Lowe was MUCH better as the antagonist in the first film.

The cameos, oh the cameos. Kevin Pollack, Drew Barrymore, James Hong, Charlton Heston, Harry Shearer and Ted McGinley. Even Heather Locklear although wisely she doesn't speak.
Kim Basinger's here too, her subplot with Garth is there just because they needed to use Kim Basinger and while she's easy on the eyes, the subplot goes nowhere. It is fun, however.

And most criminally Ed O'Neill's Glenn is reduced to one appearance. A forgotten gem of the first film, he's one and done here but still delivers a great performance. Ed O'Neill is always fantastic in anything he's in. He should always be in more things.

The soundtrack is excellent, many classic rock staples peppered throughout. If anything it's the constant references to Oliver Stones' "The Doors" that make the movie seem a trifle dated, one of those weird films that you forgot existed but made a little splash at the time.

Finally, sure, some gags you can see for a mile off but that doesn't make them any less satisfying when they land.

Should it stay or should it go?

Ultimately, "Wayne's World 2" is a dumb but fun film. I'd say even the cold-hearted of people wouldn't be able to crack a smile at least once while watching this film. I still enjoyed revisiting this one and I'm giving it a strong 8 out of 10 here. It doesn't outstay its welcome and is still a fitting end to the franchise.

So no prizes for guessing what the next review is then. If you thought I was overly complimentary of this film, you ain't seen nothing yet.

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major






 

19. Wedding Crashers

Oyyyy. I am NOT looking forward to this one.

So we reach one of the films that prompted me to start this whole blog in the first place, 2005's "Wedding Crashers". I remember it being an absolute blast in the cinema and the subsequent re-watch on home rental (lighters out for Blockbusters again please) made it just as enjoyable as the first.

But 15 years have passed since then. I've got grey hairs (god, I have a lot of grey hairs, I don't think I have any brown ones left), I eat vegetables like a normal human being should, I haven't flat shared in over 4 years, things change. Comedy tastes change. That's not to say I'm a snob if comedy's timeless it still holds the test of time and stays in my collection. My aforementioned love of Looney Tunes is still an example. I still love 'Friends', 'Seinfeld', 'Frasier', 'Cheers','Bottom', 'Animal House', The Marx Brothers. If it's funny, it stays funny.

But is "Wedding Crashers" still funny? We all sort of fell in love with the 'Frat Pack' at this point in time. We couldn't get enough of the antics of Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Jack Black, Will Ferrell et al. But now while some of their pieces still hold up or at least hold up better, there are some pieces we look back at and go 'Oh yeah...THAT...'

Time to stop procrastinating with the intro, let's get to:

WEDDING CRASHERS (2005, dir. David Dobkin)

 No charity shop in the UK is without a copy of these alongside copies of Lostprophets CDs and crockery emblazoned with Charles & Diana's wedding...

Why I bought it/Why I liked it:

We already touched upon this in the intro. Again it fell under cinema films I ended up watching with my dad. We didn't usually take in that many comedies in the cinema honestly but there was an interesting thing circling with this one.

You HAD to see it.

Like without a word of a lie 2005 was THE year for "Wedding Crashers". The buzz around it was something else. Everybody was recommending it to one another, you weren't anyone unless you went and saw this movie.

We saw it, we laughed, we liked it. It kicked off the boom of the more adult-rated comedies, a trend that's died down a lot know since peak Judd Apatow period with only Seth Rogen really waving the torch for it.

There were plenty of memorable performances in it. Off the top of my head besides the two main stars, I can remember it making a bigger name out of Rachel McAdams. It made a Hollywood name out of Isla Fisher and made us question if Jane Seymour could actually age. Oh and good ol' Christopher Walken is in it.

But here's the thing, I can't name you a single gag in "Wedding Crashers" right now. I know I ended up buying this shortly after it's home rental release but at a time when it dropped enough for me to warrant it being in my collection. To this date, I haven't actually revisited it...

If I think it'll stay in the collection:

*Winces through clenched teeth* Probably not. Times change, fads change. Hell, we thought Limp Bizkit used to be cool at one point and we were all playing Guitar Hero. Now we just swim in plastic guitars in CEX's. It'll be interesting to see how much this has aged but honestly, there are better 'Frat Pack' films (Dodgeball and Anchorman chief among them) and I don't think "Wedding Crashers" is long for the collection.

The review:

Jesus.

For a start, I never understood the allure of the two hours plus comedy. Comedies are one-two punches, they're in, they're out. It's a habit that a lot of these filmmakers, including Judd Apatow, started to pick up and honestly, it's unwelcome as you've blown your best gags within the first two acts.

"Wedding Crashers" in 2020 is very much one of those films. It has a fun premise which might be fine for like 80-90 minutes but it's not. In fact, I watched the 'Uncorked' Directors Cut which clocked in at a little over two hours. This is not advised.

It has aged better than "Zoolander", my first review way back in the summer of last year. The MVP of the piece is, without doubt, Vince Vaughn. On fine rapid delivery form, he steals the show in almost every scene he's in. The problem is this isn't really a Vince Vaughn film, he plays comedy sidekick to Owen Wilson.

Now, I'm not going to turn this into a forum to bash Owen Wilson. Even though in 2020 he's essentially a meme, he's done a lot of good work, played sidekick and stolen the show a few times and collaborated with Wes Anderson in numerous good to great films. It's just his character, John Beckwith, in an attempt to seduce Rachel McAdam's Claire Cleary (who came up with her name, Stan Lee?!?), doesn't come across as likeable. Perhaps as he himself played a similar character in "Meet The Parents", I have no sympathy if he gets the girl or not.

Chris has remembered where he'd left his watch...

As a result, the film rapidly runs out of steam and the third act is DEATH as Wilson's Beckwith goes on a redemption arc and tries to win back Clearly in a wedding scene that even by romantic standards would be too cliché.

There are germs of good ideas here and solid performances from most of the cast. Isla Fisher stands out as the kooky younger sister Gloria and it's understandable how this film made her a star. Christopher Walken is Christopher Walken, somewhat subdued but still good and Jane Seymour is terrific as Senator Cleary's wife, who's oversexed wife act sadly has no time to develop into further gags and thus is shoved into the background by the third act.  A special mention can also go to pre stubble days Bradley Cooper, here ably playing preppy douchebag Sack Lodge, Claire's fiancee. He plays the unlikeable asshole rather well.

Then there's even by 2005's standards horrible caricatures of people such as Ellen Albertini Dow's senile grandmother and Kier O' Donnell's goth closest homosexual Todd. These are bad cookie-cutter characters with no point other than to raise the odd cheap laugh.

That's not to say laughs don't come, I noticed I laughed watching this far more than "Zoolander" but that was primarily from Vaughn's excellent performance.

Should it stay or should it go?

15 years have not been kind to "Wedding Crashers". What remained hot property then has now seen the landscape change and the humour it once trumpeted now relegated to behind the spotlight. Chuckles can be had but it's not worth braving this for 2 hours just to get them.  I'll be kind and give it a quarter-point over "Zoolander", so it gets the rather odd rating of 5.75 out of 10 but that's as kind as I'm going to go.

Next up, MORE Christopher Walken!

Until next time, I remain,

Matt Major.